"So do not be ashamed to testify about our Lord..." 2 Timothy 1:8-9 NIV

Carol Jean Austin

"Three times a loser, now forever a winner"

I am a 43 year old Woman but I've been down roads most men would not enter into. I learned to work on cars so that I could steal them, then tear them down and sell them. I was one of the best theives in town. It wasn't beneath me to set fire to a drerssing room, so that I could get a rack of leather coats out the door.

Ounces of dope and illegal weapons were a way of life. All of it was a play thing to me. Nothing meant anything to me. I I thought the neatest thing about being a woman was that I could wear a dress and high heels up to a house ...Kick a door open better than most men and take everything of value. If any one walked by. I acted like "your friendly avon lady."

Armed robbery was also one of my weaknesses. I wanted so much in so little time. I thought "I love being a woman" but emotions were something I did not show. I was the backbone of my family. If they needed something, I got it. If anyone bothered them I stopped that too. "TAG," you're it was my motto with an AXE HANDLE. I've been shot, stabbed and beat up so bad, my head was shaved...to be sown up and you couldn't tell what I looked like. 'yep," I was real tough on the streets. This now makes my fourth time to prison. I didn't say I was smart, "just tough!"

My first husband was shot and died in my arms at a club. My second husband got 100 years for armed robbery. I told my third husband to, "stick with me and we'll go places!" We were married 27 days when we were arrested and he is already serving 10 years for this arrest. I came in the county jail hating everything that breathed. How unfair for them to put a Crimestoppers Reward out on me. You can probably guess who collected the reward on me. Yes, my best friend ! The one that'll stick by you through thick and thin. "Ha!"

The D.A. offered me life without parole. I was not a happy camper. When I got into the cell block that first day, a friend of mine was sitting with a woman who had been in jail(here) for 2 1/2 years. I asked her, "How do you get through it?" She (Jackie) pointed upward. Good deal, I thought, someone upstairs had some dope and cigarettes. She then said she meant God. I shot away from her like Superman's mate. I sure didn't need a "bible thumper" around bothering me. My friend kept hanging around with her so I was stuck, sitting with this "Jesus freak."

One day they said the Chaplain was there to counsel with this Preacher Girl(Jackie). When I looked to see who it was there stood an old 1970's running buddy of mine, Carl Dutton. But they said a chaplain? " surely not!" "O well," I thought, ... "Carl," I said, "Let's talk." When he pulled me out of the pod I thought, "...Things are looking up, I'll get him to do all kinds of stuff for me." The list was endless starting with a cigerette. We talked for a while and ol' Carl just didn't seem the same as I remembered. He kept talking to me about how happy he was since Jesus came into his life. I felt sorry for him, I thought, "Something must have really happened to this ol' boy. He probably got hit in the head while he was in prison." He was talking all this God stuff. I didn't even ask for my long list of favors. He had enough problems, poor guy.

Later on I broke a rule and got locked down for thirty days. As I sat there thinking about my life and the fact that I had only been out of prison for 364 days at the time of my arrest. I knew I was going back to prison and I felt hopeless. The tears started flowing and I got on my knees and I begged God to help me. I could not face all of this alone. "Please God do something before I go insane." Once again I was moved and I was placed in a double cell with the Preacher Girl, Jackie. I immediately told her that I did not want to hear any of that Jesus stuff and she left me alone. I tried to read the bible but it seemed like a foreign language to me. I could not stand Jackie's silence so I began to ask her questions because she seemed so happy. " What happens when you get saved?" ..."Where do you do it at and who all is there?" I asked. She got me an appointment with Carl Dutton. "O Boy, here was poor ol' Carl Dutton again." This time I went in thinking ...about Jesus... Not a cigarette. The more I listened to poor ol' Chaplain Carl Dutton the more sense he was making. Before I knew it He...led me in the sinners prayer. I wasn't sure what to expect after that. I hurried back to my cell and looked in the mirror. I looked the same, no glow or anything. I thought, "I may need to pray about this." I wasn't sure how to pray.

I finally learned that prayer comes from the heart if you want God to hear it. While doing my bible studies I find myself praying a lot during the day. I don't feel so alone anymore. I've been sentenced to thirty five years. I've walked in every kind of life except to walk with Jesus Christ. I feel that to walk with Jesus will be my, " FIRST VICTORY!" "ITS AWESOME!" I FEEL THAT HE HAS BEEN WAITING ON ME ALL MY LIFE. "The peace within, that I have never known...I am finally finding...just to realize that I am worth saving ...that Jesus will be with me...night and day...no matter what prison cell or other part of the world I may be in ...is the biggest comfort of all. I will never feel worthless or alone again. I have found true love and a friend in Jesus! AMEN.

Editor's note: Jackie who helped Carol has enrolled many prisoners in our free correspondence bible studies. Carol is enrolled too. Carol is now serving a new 35 year sentence. Her address is:

Carol Austin. #12733
P.O.Box 11492
Oklahoma City, OK 73136

I am sure she would welcome your letters. She needs all the encouragement she can get. Jackie is still awaiting trial. Her address is:

Jackie Hathcox
201 N. Shartel
Oklahoma City, OK 73102

Permission to use granted by Don Holt
Breaking Free Newsletter - August 1996

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